A Return to Reading
Feb 19, 2023
Feb 19, 2023
Years ago, I decided to give up reading for a while. Not because I didn't want to read--like most writers, I loved reading with a passion. But I'd been noticing that whatever I was reading was being echoed in whatever I was writing every single time, which created some truly bizarre works when I was bouncing back and forth between David Gemmell, Terry Pratchett, Robert Rankin, and others. I wanted to take some time away from other people's work, and see if I couldn't find my own voice.
Fast forward quite a number of years, though, and not reading had become as much a habit as reading ever was. And as you likely know already, bad habits can be hard to shake. The space in my day where I used to read had now been given over to other things--less enjoyable things, perhaps, and maybe worthless or pointless things, but things that nonetheless resented giving up their space.
It's happened with other things I've loved to do, too. You set them aside for a while, thinking that you'll return to them later. You love them, after all, so how hard can it be to do? But by the time you decide to go back, that space they occupied in your life has healed over--you need to carve out a new one to make room for them again.
But, I found a space for my reading again, and in the end, it dropped right back into where it was before. Not the long, lazy Sundays where I used to lie by myself and read through sometimes several whole books in a day, but the ends to the day, the nights before bed, when the energy for other things has faded away. Even that, though, took some care to put back, as I was used to wasting that hour or two before bed on other, rarely worthwhile things.
I tried to get it back again for some years. Here and there it would take, briefly, before going again. But it feels like it's back, now--and I feel more like myself with it there. I didn't entirely realise just how much I missed it.
For all that, though, I'm still glad I did this. Because now, when I read, it doesn't show up in my writing. When I write, it's my voice now, always me. I've written a lot between then and now, and my own way of expressing what I'm thinking has taken root. But I'm just as glad, perhaps more glad, to have found my way back to it again.
Fast forward quite a number of years, though, and not reading had become as much a habit as reading ever was. And as you likely know already, bad habits can be hard to shake. The space in my day where I used to read had now been given over to other things--less enjoyable things, perhaps, and maybe worthless or pointless things, but things that nonetheless resented giving up their space.
It's happened with other things I've loved to do, too. You set them aside for a while, thinking that you'll return to them later. You love them, after all, so how hard can it be to do? But by the time you decide to go back, that space they occupied in your life has healed over--you need to carve out a new one to make room for them again.
But, I found a space for my reading again, and in the end, it dropped right back into where it was before. Not the long, lazy Sundays where I used to lie by myself and read through sometimes several whole books in a day, but the ends to the day, the nights before bed, when the energy for other things has faded away. Even that, though, took some care to put back, as I was used to wasting that hour or two before bed on other, rarely worthwhile things.
I tried to get it back again for some years. Here and there it would take, briefly, before going again. But it feels like it's back, now--and I feel more like myself with it there. I didn't entirely realise just how much I missed it.
For all that, though, I'm still glad I did this. Because now, when I read, it doesn't show up in my writing. When I write, it's my voice now, always me. I've written a lot between then and now, and my own way of expressing what I'm thinking has taken root. But I'm just as glad, perhaps more glad, to have found my way back to it again.
Crescent Cross reprinted in The Dark Door #3
Feb 02, 2023
Feb 02, 2023
The Dark Door magazine, from lo-fi hip-hop label Ill Advised Records, picked up and reprinted Crescent Cross, a Twilight-Zone style of horror story that was my first ever published work of fiction!
The Dark Door is a true-blood zine, too, a horror-themed magazine filled with stories, creepy art, and--I am led to believe--creepy music too! And I love the look of what they're doing with it, just check it out:
This style of black-and-white zine is something that I used to look upon with envy as a young writer, because it seemed like their day had come and gone, and that the chance to be included in one had likely slipped me by. But it turns out it was just waiting around the corner for me to catch up, and now it's given Crescent Cross a second chance at life.
If this looks like the kind of thing you might have a hankering for, I'd love it if you'd go and check it out.
The Dark Door is a true-blood zine, too, a horror-themed magazine filled with stories, creepy art, and--I am led to believe--creepy music too! And I love the look of what they're doing with it, just check it out:
This style of black-and-white zine is something that I used to look upon with envy as a young writer, because it seemed like their day had come and gone, and that the chance to be included in one had likely slipped me by. But it turns out it was just waiting around the corner for me to catch up, and now it's given Crescent Cross a second chance at life.
If this looks like the kind of thing you might have a hankering for, I'd love it if you'd go and check it out.
The Website Is Alive!
Jan 16, 2023
Jan 16, 2023
It's been a while coming, but at long last, there's more than just a landing page on this website. Probably not a LOT more than just that, but hey, I'll take what I can get...
If there's one thing that's a difficulty with being a software engineer, it's this idea that you can do things yourself. And mostly, probably, that you get irritated with not being able to tinker with the things that you haven't done yourself to your heart's content. This causes you to think you should just start from scratch, make everything up just the way you want, and...
Yeah, that. Several years down the line, you find that you probably shouldn't have bothered with all that, and maybe you should just have made up some custom CSS or other to modify a pre-built and left it at that. But, I didn't, so...this is what we have now.
Welcome, and I hope you enjoy.
If there's one thing that's a difficulty with being a software engineer, it's this idea that you can do things yourself. And mostly, probably, that you get irritated with not being able to tinker with the things that you haven't done yourself to your heart's content. This causes you to think you should just start from scratch, make everything up just the way you want, and...
Yeah, that. Several years down the line, you find that you probably shouldn't have bothered with all that, and maybe you should just have made up some custom CSS or other to modify a pre-built and left it at that. But, I didn't, so...this is what we have now.
Welcome, and I hope you enjoy.